Merry Christmas ... in 57 simple steps.

Christmas is a time many parent dread because it involves unpacking children's toys (practically impossible) and assembling children's toys (virtually impossible).  But, as it has been pointed out before, Virg and Daddy can fix/assemble anything with ease.  But how, you ask?  Virg can tell you that there are three simple steps.  First, throw away the instructions, they will only lead to frustration and confusion.  Second, and this is the most important, improvise.  The pictures on the box are only one persons interpretation of what the toy should look like once completely assembled.  Finally, learn to live in an imperfect world.  Sure, there are five to ten peaces you didn't use when building the toy.  It's called conservation, so congratulations, you're saving the world.  And if anyone comments on why it doesn't look like it does on the box, just tell them "Because the toy isn't selling awesome, you have to add that yourself!"

Perfect, now hold still while I get the trebuchet.